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2001 AM General Hummer
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| Far, far from the average anaesthetized SUV |
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| Updated |
Jul 7, 2004 20:38:55 |
| Rating |
 16 ( -2 -12.5% ) | | Author | Eric Peters |
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Description:
As Rocky showed us, in boxing, heart can carry you through 15 rounds with Apollo Creed. In the world of high-end automobiles or SUVs, it's wowing power. As in, "wow, what the heck was that?"
The AM General Hummer has top-tier wow power. Though it is based on a rude and crude 16-year-old military vehicle, the Hummer has managed to enthrall enough civilian buyers with its he-man image (Ahhhnuld owns one) and attitudinizing, crush-them-all capability to remain a viable commercial property. People remain willing to fork over presidential pardon-sized chunks of change to own one. The cheapest two-door models start at $75,987 and prices canoodle up to well into the six figures for a loaded four-door wagon equipped with the optional 12,000-lb rated winch ($2688).
All this for a vehicle whose outsize proportions make it awkward to drive on public roads, difficult to park, that takes almost 20 seconds to make it to 60 mph, and which lacks the basic social graces or refinement of most ten-year-old economy cars. It is the vehicular equivalent of Neanderthal Man sitting on top of a table at a fancy restaurant, gnawing on the leg of a giant Emu while shooting beady-eyed death glares at the other diners.
But boy, do people gawk. Some in fear — I had two different drivers pull over to let me pass by rather than deal with the intimidating presence of the Hummer in their rearview mirror — others in admiration of the carbuncle-covered, hairy-forearmed, kick-butt mien of this vehicle. Even painted in cheery civilian colors and with some carpet glued to the floorpans, this monstrosity gets respect in the same way a team of SEALs with Heckler & Koch machine pistols does. You do not want to get in the way. The Hummer makes all other SUVs seem almost effeminate. Park one next to (on top of?) any Ford Expedition and see for yourself. Even the burly Toyota Land Cruiser looks like a toy by comparison; a miserable little dinghy bobbing next to the mighty hull of the battleship Iowa.
Vital check
So this is what the Hummer delivers for all that dough: an endless ability to rouse the attention of the peanut gallery — and the delicious knowledge that you could barrel through, around or over anything that annoys you. Sure, you'll likely never need the tremendous off-road capability of the Hummer — but hey, if The End ever does come, you'll have the equipment to deal with looting hordes and the collapse of the social order.
Check the Hummer's vitals: It has 16 inches of boulder-hopping ground clearance (the typical SUV has about 7 or 8), gear reduction hubs and AM General's ground-chewing TT4 traction control system. Add in the optional central inflating/deflating tire system (CTIS) — which enables you to drop the psi of all four 36-inch tires down to 10 pounds of pressure or less for hard-core sand/beach use, then reinflate them at the touch of a button — and what you've got is one tough mutha.
The Hummer comes in four basic configurations: Two and four-door hardtops, an "open top" or convertible model — and a wagon, which has a Mini-Me bed in the back sizeable enough to haul a Labrador retriever — or a couple of NATO 7.62 millimeter ammo boxes.
Hummer Power comes from a 6.5-liter GM turbo-diesel V-8, which is fitting since GM now controls AM General. The general's footprint is also evident in the knobs and controls, the air conditioner/heater panel, and audio system (the same "Monsoon" mega-stereo offered on ordinary GM passenger cars is also offered on the 2001 Hummer). The turbo-diesel is rated at 195 hp and 430 lb-ft of torque. It makes rumbly-growly sounds appropriate to the home it has found underneath the Hummer's one-piece, rearward raising hood. Full-time four-wheel-drive with foundation-crumbling low range is also standard.
There is ample torque for the tasks the Hummer was designed to perform, but acceleration is torpid. Three tons and 195 hp, plus less than ideal gearing do not a quick trip make. Top speed — if you keep your foot in it long enough and are brave enough to do this on gumball tires not rated for high-speed travel — approaches 90 mph. Maybe.
Mega-monolith
Even in the largest four-door model, there is only room enough inside for four people, the megalithic exterior notwithstanding. And each passenger is effectively parked in another solar system. Up front, a huge console separates driver from front seat passenger; in back, the two rear occupants are kept apart by a raised platform with a swath of carpet glued on top.
The ride is about what you'd expect, if you happen to be a veteran of Operation Desert Storm. It shakes, it bobs, it rattles and rolls. And the Hummer has one oceanic attribute that may give land-lubbers a serious touch of the queasies: as it comes to a stop, the forward momentum of the body is not entirely arrested by the brakes. The entire chassis continues to roll back and forth slightly on the extra-tall, super-fat tires. Even though it's not actually moving, you find yourself mashing the brake pedal as the Hummer seems to inch forward, then roll back on its feet like a punch-drunk palooka. You get used to it — and the heavy drone of the tires at road speed — but it gives you a sense of how rough and tumble the Hummer really is.
For the 2001 model year, AM General has made a few subtle but important changes to make this military-intended, no-nonsense vehicle a bit less of a bear for non-grunts to deal with. The controls and instruments are less intimidating than they were before, and heated exterior mirrors are now available. Buy the $1879 Monsoon premium audio system to drown out the convoy-esque sounds from the tires and the rumpety-rump diesel and you can almost believe you are driving something designed to be used on public roads, as opposed to invading Iraq. |
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